Doc's appointment in HUKM...

15 April came and off again we went to HUKM
for our appointment with Prof Zainul Rashid...
We arrived early for our apointment but we still had to wait
until nearly 11 before we were called in...
and we didn't even get to meet the prof...
what a disappointment...for well....i was really
looking forward to it...
to the prof who operated on Bed....hahaha...
just curious actually...since Bed likes him pretty much...
ANyway...we were met by Doc Natasha...a pretty lady...
who's pretty friendly and with good eye contact...
and give you that confidence when met first time...
she explained to us the process involved in IVF..
well...i pretty much know about it through my online research and such...
just that...well...she took everything by faith...
like she couldn't view the CD we brought on the
diagnostic laparoscopy i did
in KPJ....(for a hospital that can do some
sophisticated procedures on conception....they really
need to update their computer system...hardware and software
alike...)
Well...she sent me for baseline scanning
and she said everything seemed ok...
so we can practically start the procedure when my
next period comes...
Hah...too early...scary....not mentally prepare for it...
neither is my wallet prepared for it...
but Chin wanted it in May...
(well...he never thinks thing through...so
i didn't really get mad at him...)
Am I the only rational one in this marriage???
One who think things meticulously before i make my
decision???
One who is most of the time logical...looking at everything from
all four dimension?
Hmmm....HUKM charges 10k for the procedure...roughly...
depending on the dosage of the medication and stuff...
much cheaper than KPJ...
but 10k at this moment???
oh well...if i really work it out...
i guess i can afford 10k...
i'll let the issue simmer first before i decide...
sit on it...sleep on it...
and well...pray for it???
so i'll be courageous enough hopefully
when the time come...
I guess this is the ONE bridge that GOD really wants
me to cross...
I'll cross it when the time comes...
but for now...i'll let it rest...

Doc's appointment on Feb 13, Friday the 13th...

My appointment with my gynae,
Dr Ishak Abdul Samad was
scheduled yesterday...
I am supposed to get my laparoscopy
report from or or sumting like that....
We asked him about places that he would recommend for
us to seek further treatment...
one that is within our budget....
he said we can try LPPKN but the waiting list could be very long
because it is a government agency....
apart from that he suggested HUKM and he mentioned 2 profs' names...
and i heard about one of them
because my friend, Bed, is consulting him too.
He treated her for endomyosis( or such)
and i told Dr Ishak about it...
He wrote a recomendation letter for me to see
Prof. Dr Zainul Rashid.
He called up HUKM to make an appointment for me
but the prof wasn't in so now i am
still awaiting the doc's call...
I asked Bed about this prof and she said that he is a very
nice man...one who is very reassuring...
soft-spoken, rich and famous...LOL...
the last 2 adjectives are just to emphasis that
he is wanted everywhere....
for his skills and knowledge and expertise, of course...
I found another blog that mentioned about him....
and this person describes him as down-to-earth...
and this is a comforting word because
i am not one who likes intimidating people...
i have difficulty expressing my worries and doubts and
fears and what not....
That is why Dr Ishak is a good choice for me...
He is, too, a down-to-earth and comforting man....
one that exudes confidence and reassures you that
he knows what he's doing...
and i somehow feel that he knows that
i fear needle and such like....
so in each scary statement that involves injection, or incision
or any such thing...he would say...
of course...there's nothing to be scared of...it's pretty minor....
or...the needle is pretty small...you won't
feel it....kinda stuff....
that's why he's the doc...and we commoners are the patients...
Anyway...it's a scary move for me....and i do not know
if Chin understands it or not...
it is a big decision that involves mental preparation
and all and i do not feel the support yet from him...
it scares me....the mere thought of the whole procedure...
maybe because i have a vague idea about the actual process...
i did numerous researches on the internet about IVF and read about it
and try to be mentally prepare but at the end of the day...
i will be the one who will undergo all the painful
procedure....and only i alone will know the frustration of
at the receiving end...
We never actually sit down and talk about it...
This has been at the back of my mind since
the day Dr Ishak told us about the result of the laparoscopy procedure
last month....
I am a nervous wreck...haha....waiting for the call
about the appointment...
and i know how my reaction will be when
i go for the appointment...
cold feet and hands....rite...
cold all over....butterflies in the stomach...and such....
When i'm nervous...i menggigil-gigil, okay?
But that's a natural reaction....rite?
Rite, you go girl....

Cervical polyps...NOT!!! Phew....am i glad...

I went to Rekha yesterday to get my pap smear report and let her have another look at my cervical area....so after school, we arrived there slightly over 5. We had to wait for a bit but luckily, it was just a 5 mins wait and there were not many people....
I went in, the good doc asked me how i felt, and i answered okay...and that i thought the infection is cured because the discharge is normal....
She asked me to lie down so she could have a look....she took one look at the outside condition and then a quick poke and she confirmed that everything is ok...i asked a few questions about causes and all and she said my pap smear result is ok...so i guess...it is a great relief....
I was so worried that i would have to get extra treatment etc...and that the polyps will cause further complication, but thank God, it was just an infection....
Now i have to wait for my next period before i call up LPPKN for my next appointment...I forsee a long, tedious road to successful reproduction for me and Chin....
Some people are just lucky enough to be gifted with the fertility of a rabbit but there are some who have to go through difficulties before they can actually experience the happiness....
Oh well.....pray that we will not have to wait long....

Cervical polyps or not...? That's the confusion...

I feel confuse with my period cycle....i don't think i have regular cycle...i lost count....keep a diary but not sure when it started wen it ended and even whether it's normal or not...
To think that being a woman i should know....
I am suppose to do pap smear...and x-ray but the x-ray part was unsuccessful...so now the pap smear story.

I had period 4 3 weeks in oct and then when i wanted to do pap smear...it was on the 14th day...and being gov dept, they don't accept doing it after that...so i had to wait for the next cycle. Anyway, i wasnt so sure it it's really the end of my period and the 14th day. So, the next cycle ended, i was in Serian. I reckon that i go to the Klinik Ibu2 to do it on Friday....but well...being a goverment dept again (what's wrong with these gov servant problem), i arived at 3 pm and they said they had sterilised all the equipment( mind you, they only need a spatula, glove and the clip to open the cervical area) and that i was too late and had to wait for next friday. I didn't think i could wait that long so i went to Clinic Kiu instead. My sis said he's a gynae. I went to get it done.
Unfortunately, the good doc said i have got cervical polyps and that i had to get it treated or check first. he wouldn't do the pap smear procedure. The good doc wrote a letter to refer me to the hospital and so i went a week after that.

My good friend, the period came right after that...i was not sure if it was a period or the after effect or being poke with a clip so i waited. When i finally went to the hospital, the new good doc took a peek at my cervical area and said there was non...no cervical polyps and that i have a beautiful cervical area....(which did not amuse me). She asked what i expected her to do(coming from a doctor) so i told her. Refer me to a gynae in Seremban so i can really confirm about the polyps thingy. S, she wrote a lengthy letter to describe my symptoms and suggested that i get a pap smear done in Seremban.

And that brings me to last Saturday....Klinik Wanita Rekha. She's the expert in Women's problems and so i went there to get the pap smear done. She took a look, put the spatula in, a quick slightly painful swab and told me there is an infection inside. I told her the history and the mystery of the two docs opinion and she said neither is correct. The infection part is the correct one. So, she prescribed me with some antibiotics and asked me to come back in 10 days time for the pap smear result as well as another examination of the cervical area. So, i have yet to see her...and in the mean time, i don't want to scare myself. The polyps had caused me a scare already and now i just want to teke things easy, listen to what the good doc has to say...and maybe then, once it is treated, i can proceed with a normal period cycle again and then finally..with the reproduction process......

The journey towards successful human reproduction...

Last 2 months, the 3rd of Sept. was the beginning...i foresee a long journey of pain and hopes and frustration and much more to come and i hope the two of us will brave through it together.
Relatives of the husband side have been nagging for so long about our carefree lifestyle - childless that is - and thus incomplete in their eyes. Some even dare enough to ask boldly by saying "When are you going to make me an auntie?" I think being Malaysian, I or a majority of the women have to learn to be "thick face" when facing this situation....Malaysians are well-known for being notoriously tactless when it comes to reproduction of the human being.Hmmm....
So, in order to fulfill the general public views of a complete family, I called up LPPKN (Lembaga Penduduk dan Pembangunan Keluarga Negara) in KL to hopefully solve this problem. The country, in its effort to populate itself, has offered to foot half of the bills for reproducing the first child when it is successfully done. So, being the government servant that we are, we want to give the facility a try since we heard from colleagues that LPPKN has full facilities for this purpose.
The first appointment was just TEST solely - sperm count, blood test for specific hormones and also the interview.
Men are blessed with the luck to possess the equipment that produce the specimen without much pain (but i think it may cause pleasure to some) but women are not so lucky in this deal. We have to endure endless poking into our blood veins just to produce the blood for the tests required. We also have to face fallopian tube x-ray and the much invasive pap smear and not to mention endless blood test.
Well, I am trying to think positively despite all the pain and hardship that women have to endure and hopefully at the end of it, we will be successful in reproducing mini us.
I am supposed to fix an appointment for my X-ray on the 19th of this month and then, another blood test for progesterone and then go for a pap smear test. Then i have to wait patiently for the next visit of my best friend before i can set the date for my next LPPKN appointment.
Pray hard that there's nothing wrong with our reproductive system so that we can finally have the pleasure of having mini US.